Blackmail After a Dating Chat: What to Do If Someone Threatens to Share Your Photos
Updated 2026-10-20
Being threatened with your own intimate photos is frightening, and it is not your fault. This guide sums up the steps the US Federal Trade Commission and the StopNCII service recommend. It is general information, not legal advice.
First steps
- Do not pay. The FTC says not to pay the blackmailer and not to give them access to your devices or financial accounts.
- Stop replying and block the person on every platform.
- Talk to someone you trust, such as a friend, a family member or a counselor. You do not have to deal with this alone.
- Before you delete anything, take screenshots of the messages, the profile and any payment requests. Reporting forms usually ask for them.
Where to report in the United States
- Report to your local police.
- Report to the FBI at its tips website or by phone on 1-800-225-5324.
- If the victim is a minor, report through the CyberTipline of the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. Its phone line is 1-800-843-5678.
If your photos were already shared
- Report the images to the platform where they appear. The FTC says the Take It Down Act requires platforms to remove intimate images within 48 hours of your request, at no cost to you.
- If the platform does not remove them in 48 hours, report it to the FTC at TakeItDown.ftc.gov.
- StopNCII.org is a free tool for adults. It creates a digital fingerprint (a hash) of your image on your own device, and only the fingerprint is shared with participating companies so they can detect and remove matching copies. The image itself is not uploaded.
- StopNCII is for you if you are the person in the image, were 18 or older when it was taken, are over 18 now, and still have the image or video.
Beware of paid removal services
The FTC warns people to search a company's name together with words like scam, review or complaint before paying anyone to remove images, and to skip the paid ads at the top of search results. The agency has alleged that one company took thousands of dollars from victims without delivering what it promised.
Outside the United States
Our guide on where to report a dating scam lists the official reporting channels for the UK, Canada, Australia, New Zealand and Ireland. StopNCII.org is operated by the Revenge Porn Helpline, part of the UK charity SWGfL, and is not limited to one country. Also tell your bank or card provider if you paid anything.
Questions
Should I pay the person who is blackmailing me?
No. The FTC advises against paying. Stop communicating, block the person and report it.
How fast must a platform remove intimate images?
The FTC says that under the Take It Down Act platforms must remove them within 48 hours of your request, free of charge. If they do not, you can report it to the FTC at TakeItDown.ftc.gov.
Does StopNCII upload my photos?
No. A hash is created on your own device and only that fingerprint is shared with participating companies. The service does not download your images.
Is it safe to pay a company to remove my images?
Be careful. The FTC advises searching the company name with words like scam or complaint first, and it has alleged that one such firm took thousands of dollars without delivering.
More guides
- How to Spot Fake Profiles and Bots on Dating Sites
- How to Check if a Dating Site Is Legit: A 10-Point Checklist
- How to Cancel a Dating Subscription and Stop Recurring Charges
- Privacy on Adult Dating Sites: 8 Practical Steps
- How to Dispute a Dating Site Charge and Ask for a Refund
- A Charge You Do Not Recognise: What to Do
- Where to Report a Dating Scam, by Country